Recently, I encountered a crossroads between my genuine needs and the desire to please others. This prompted me to reflect and delve deeper into my journey of self-discovery and self-care.

I was invited to attend an online session, an opportunity that could add value to my work repertoire. However, I have conflicting commitments in my schedule, and my initial instinct was to decline. Yet, against my better judgment, I said ‘yes’ with the intention of multitasking.

Thankfully, the other party sensed my hesitation and told me to reconsider. It was then that I realized what I was doing; hence, I expressed my constraints and finally said ‘no.’ This incident ignited my curiosity, as I know that I have come a long way in developing my ability to say ‘no.’

After some processing, I discovered the root cause—a recent experience in my work that triggered a feeling of rejection in me. Unwittingly, it created a setback in my ability to assert my needs. This experience serves as a reminder that setbacks happen, even to those well-versed in self-care.

As someone passionate about holistic self-care, I recognize the profound impact of self-compassion. Instead of chastising myself, I acknowledged the setback as a natural part of the human experience. The previous version of me would have engaged in self-criticism, asking, “What is wrong with you?” Armed with the power of self-compassion, I embraced this revelation with self-kindness.

As high-performing women, we navigate numerous demands in our lives. I hope my story inspires you to be kind to yourself when you fall short of your own expectations. May we remember that success is not just about achievements, but also about the gentle way we care for our own hearts.